Lords of Suwa
by Alpha Centauri
Summary: He had always been there, always. But when he's taken by a mysterious force, Kurogane will stop at nothing to get him back. Not even if the blonde does not remember and no longer wish to go back... kuro x fay
1. Prologue

**A.C.:** Yes... as if there aren't enough Kuro x Fays already... It's a 'what if'on if Fay had chosen to run by himself rather than ask for the time witch's help. Where would he have landed up? Who would have he met? What could have he done :D

**Disclaimer:** I would love to own Fay... meaning I don't own Tsubasa Chronicles

**Pairings:** Kurogane + Fay

**Warnings:** Kuro x Fay-ness, author's insanity, horrible grammar... there could be spoilers if you haven't been following the series closely.

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He had always been there, always.

His grandfather once told him that he was a wandering mage, looking for a safe place to stay until it was time to go. Out of pity, his grandfather had taken him under his wing, never knowing who exactly he had picked up.

The boy was a mage

Or supposed to be, Haganemaru had never seen him perform tricks of any kind. He always politely refused all requests of magic or fortunetelling. He would laugh gaily in rain or shine, never complaining, never striving to make things better, more comfortable for himself. The mage never seemed to do anything besides help his mother maintain the barrier.

But he was always there when he looked up; it was as if that fair golden head and the lanky limbs were as much a part of his country, his home as he was.

He never aged

And he never seemed to.

Fay was a boy when helping his mother perform ceremonies. A boy when running through the grass after dumping Kurogane in the water. A boy when he came to fetch Haganemaru out of the woods for supper.

A man when defending the stronghold alongside his father

His grandfather told him that he was not a boy, not a man. He wasn't even sure that Fay was human.

The first time he had seen the man when his mother fainted after a blinding lightning had cracked down hard upon Suwa's barrier. Only it wasn't lightning but magical of origin. His father had gone out immediately, leaving with only two attendants to fight with the demons outside the barrier. Amazingly the barrier had survived even when his mother had collapsed, but it was obvious that it was about to go down, his father wouldn't be able to make it in time...

He had noticed Fay leave at the corner of his eyes, Fay with his blonde hair and pale was hard to miss. But he had been so worried about his mother, pale and coughing up blood, to give a second thought about the golden boy with blue eyes.

His father came back, carrying a bleeding man in his arms as the two attendants following closely. His mother had recovered sufficiently enough to help and he was pushed aside as a man with hair as gold as Fay's was laid on a spread.

He had tried to look over their shoulders, where was Fay? Who was this man and why did he look like Fay. In the midst of healing and sewing, the man had opened his eyes. They were the same clear blue like Fay's, when their eyes met he smiled and Kurogane realized that the man was Fay.

He had broken into hysterics after that, the man couldn't possibly be Fay. Fay who looked so fragile couldn't possibly be the man smiling and covered in blood. He couldn't possibly be the man whose broken bones were audibly snapped in place as splints were set up to make sure that they were healed correctly. He didn't notice when his father, also covered in blood, took a hold of him and carried him off into his room. He didn't notice that for the span of time he had screamed for blue eyes, Fay had already been there trying to calm him down. All he remembered of that time were of blue eyes and blood, the waiting, and pain, pain, pain...

The possibility of Fay dying.

But He had always been there, always.

Much like Suwa and all its lords.

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**A.C.:** Reviews would be nice :D Not so certain about this story so... ideas would be nice too 


	2. Aimless Wanderings

**A.C.:**...it was the most horrible week... ever -weeps-

**Disclaimer:** I would love to own Fay... meaning I don't own Tsubasa

**Pairings:** Kurogane + Fay

**Warnings:** Kuro x Fay-ness, author's insanity, horrible grammar... there could be spoilers if you haven't been following the series closely.

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He had given Fay so many things...

...But Fay had given back so much more

Fai had been his...

_...First crush_

He probably had been six? Seven? He was a kid back then; just another stupid little kid with nothing more in his head than beating other's his own age at something or another. But he had been a kid back then and figured Fay must be one too. And seeing how much time the blue eyed blonde spent around his parents made him jealous, just a little.

Perhaps if Fay had been a girl... well Fay was pretty much a girl in a boy's body –he thought- it wouldn't have mattered. Because girls were weird and carried weird diseases like cooties and there was absolutely no way he would have been made to go near one at his tender age of six... seven.

But Fay was a boy...

Or he was supposed to be...

And he had taken a dare he couldn't back down on, to capture the golden locks and see if they were actually as soft as they looked.

He could have just asked Fay for a few strands he knew. Fay was so... nice to him. Even when he threw tantrums about the supposed 'mage' not doing active magic tricks like his mother, He hadn't known back then that Fay did use minor magickery to keep things running smoothly. Things no one really noticed like how cuts didn't seem half as bad when he was bandaging them. Or how their workloads seem to have lessened, their limbs stronger, when the mage tried to mimic the various birdcalls while they were working (though that sometimes resulted in burst eardrums).

He had... taken Fay for granted back then.

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His prey now in sight Haganemaru crouched, and waited. Sure enough, the blonde began to twirl -_wtf?- _past his perch singing on top of his lungs about black puppies and kitties. Resisting the urge to yell at Fay to shut up, Kurogane jumped, and ended up eating dirt. Laughter, the bastard. A pale hand thrust itself into view and Kurogane took it abet grudgingly as the blonde began to fuss over him, worrying particularly at the scraped palms as knees as he got up.

"You moved." Haganemaru grumped, "You weren't supposed to move."

"You weren't supposed to jump, so we're even." Fay chirped, ruffling Haganemaru's hair.

The red-eyed boy immediately smoothed his hair back down (even though they went right back up). Fay had no right to do that to him, he was only a bit –like an inch Haganemaru thought, a foot and a half most everybody thought- taller than him so it wouldn't have been long before Haganemaru outgrew the blonde.

Pouting, Haganemaru kicked at the dirt, bracing himself for the inevitable jeers of his peers as he came back empty-handed.

A fluttery sort of sigh and the hand reached out again,

"Here."

Haganemaru looked speechlessly up at Fay when a lock of shimmering platinum hair was presented to him. Fay smiled. Not trusting himself to speak at all, Kurogane took the hairs and ran as fast as his legs could carry him. Far away from Fay as to not let him see the red blush spreading across his cheeks...

"Well, I see you're up to no good."

"Ara?"

An elegant pair approached, the man holding out a parasol for the woman as they greeted Fay. They shared a fond look as Haganemaru's small form disappeared over the horizon. The man furrowed his forehead slightly as he turned towards the blonde,

"What are you planning this time?"

"Hmm, hmm, Big-Kuro's grown up so much!" Fai chirped, putting the miko between him and the lord. "Why I still remember when you were just like him Lord-Kuro." The effect was instantaneous. A blush not unlike his son's flared across the Suwa lord's face as his wife began to clap her hands together in delight.

"Oh Fay-san, you promised to tell me about the..." she wrinkled her nose delicately to get a hold of the foreign word, "Je-rii?" and as Kurogane tried to stop the blonde from ever speaking again, the blonde corrected,

"'Jelly' dear lady. The most wonderful creation ever, ever invented." Kurogane did not like the devious twinkled in the blue eyes, "Just ask Big-Kuro here." Fay winked at the said lord as he turned the lady around by her hands. "He knows all about it."

"It's Kuro_**gane**_..." the lord stressed irritably but Fay had already rapidly begun to inform the giggling miko about the sweet, wiggly, -evil, Kurogane thought- treats.

"...So I dared him to stuff as much of if as he could into his mouth..."

"Alright, stop right there!"

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_...His first secret..._

"Kuro-pii, what are you doing?" Haganemaru jumped up and turned around, denial dying on his lips as he came face to face with a pair of enormous blue eyes and a shock full of wavy gold hair. Haganemaru instantly paled his mind in an overdrive to provide his young mind with all sorts of outcomes for this scenario. Unable to think of anything remotely sentient, he yelled out the first thing that crossed his head.

"I didn't do it!" Fay looked amused –and kept trying to look over Haganemaru's shoulders to see what the boy was hiding- and replied cheerfully,

"Well now I KNOW you did something Gane-pon." And Fay began to poke the slowly inflating cheeks repeatedly with an index finger. "So what did you do Gane-wan huh? Huh? Huh?" Haganemaru began to flail his arms around, trying to will the blonde away.

"I didn't do anything!"

Fay promptly jumped on the boy. The Suwa heir was surprised to find that the blonde was as light as a feather. But again, panic overrode reason and he blurted out,

"You can't make me!" Haganemaru began to blush furiously at his foolish mistake. Fay began to laugh gaily. Birds fluttered up into the air at the bell-like –Haganemaru thought- tones and he sullenly sat down on the grass and let Fay see what he had been hiding.

"Aho, that's bad." And Haganemaru sank a bit lower in to his seat knowing that it would be worse when he heard Fay's solemn voice say that out aloud.

"Bad? Kaasan will kill me!" it was a vase with a simple floral design in oddly bright pink. But it was... had been... his mother's favorite, a gift from Amaterasu herself. His mother would kill him when she found out that he had accidentally broke it while swinging his practice sword inside the house.

"No not kill, sad and disappointed perhaps..." Fay rattled on, making Haganemaru feel like something fished out of the gutters with each word.

"Keep it a secret... please?" he had to literally choke the last word out of his voice box but he liked the effects. Fay looked surprised and Haganemaru decided that he liked the expression. So wide-eyed and honest looking compared to his usual mischievous and cryptic air.

"She'll find out sooner or later Gane-chan."

"It's Haganemaru," Haganemaru corrected half-heartedly.

"Don't worry; I'll keep it a secret!" Haganemaru looked up in surprise as Fay began to thump his chest with a fist. "Now come, you're late for your practice."

Unbeknown to Haganemaru, Fay had later come back to that place in the clearing and had somehow pieced it back together. He could barely notice slight dents where the cracks had been but what moved Haganemaru the most was Fay's torn, bloodied and bandaged hands, waving in the last of the sun as he welcomed them back home.

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_...First love..._

A shadow of a large bird fell over him and at first Haganemaru thought it was a mythical bird of some kind for the lines were too smooth, too graceful and long and elegant to be those of a fierce hawk that nested around the Suwa compound sometimes. He looked up, fully expecting a legendary creature out of old bedtime stories and saw that it was not a bird at all but a human. Fay to be exact.

The blonde stretched his arms up in the air, feet and legs precariously dangling over the rooftops as he arched his spine, his hair catching the last rays of the sun. But that hadn't been the most surprising thing; Fay wasn't a boy he saw in the morning teasing him about how 'Gane-poo's growing up so fast'. He was a man, again just as blue eyed an angel-faced as the boy, as the bloodied and broken man he saw carried into the main house one night.

Continence bathed in unperceived sadness, his hands seemed to reach for the sun. It was in that moment Haganemaru realized that it was no longer a silly crush. It was... love and it made him sick to his stomach knowing that Fay could never possibly be his.

But it wouldn't have stopped him from loving Fay anyways.

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_First kiss..._

He had been brooding for hours when Fay found him sitting on a rock. He was looking at the darkening sky, his face set into a determined scowl. He couldn't help but replay the events of the afternoon over and over again as the temperatures plummeted and his stomach growled to let him know that he missed lunch and possibly dinner too if he didn't get his ass off the boulder.

"Naa Gane-tan, you'll get wrinkles if you scowl for so long." Grinning at the small jump from the Japanese boy, Fay continued on conversationally, "I mean look what happened to Big-Kuro, and I warned him about it for sooo long..."

"Oy mage."

"Yes Gane-muu?"

For once Haganemaru didn't correct the blonde. Fay pouted in disappointment as he took a seat next to the red-eyed teen, sneaking looks at the angled face. Haganemaru seemed to be deep in thought and Fay wondered...

"What's it like being kissed?" Fay nearly fell off, feeling as if a bomb had exploded in his head. Or he was too busy simply trying to wash out his ears and see if he had heard him right. Grumpily Kurogane asked the smaller boy "Is it that shocking?" Fay gave the teen a teary look,

"Waii! Gane-myuu's growing up!!" and promptly latched himself onto Kurogane's neck.

"Hey...!! Get off!!" Haganemaru blushed wildly. Fay's light yukata had ridden up the pale legs nearly up to the thighs and Haganemaru really did not need that much fuel for his wet dreams thank-you-very-much. When they had finally separated, the heir looking like a ripe tomato and the mage looking like something out of cheap shoutacon with his shoulders bare, Fay gave a light cough.

"What brought this on?"

Haganemaru scratched his head, not willing to meet Fay's eyes.

"Some of the guys were talking about it and... I was curious alright! I mean... they said some stuff about this girl and how great it was when they... you know..." Haganemaru trailed off with Fay nodding sagely at the end though he wasn't quite sure what Fay was nodding at.

"Ah yes, Big-Kuro's been a bad teacher not teaching you about the birds and the bees, Big-Big-Kuro did the same thing."

Haganemaru frowned,

"Birds and what?"

Fay jumped on him again.

"But then that means I get Gane-pipi's first kiss!"

"Wait a second!!" Haganemaru roared, trying to push Fay's face away from the vicinity of his head. "I never said I wanted to be kissed!"

"No," Fay sang happily. "You implied it." Wondering if it was possible for an innocent-looking kid like Fay to have such a perverted look on his face Haganemaru managed to flip them both over and was about to run when his accursed practice sword poked him hard in his gut. He doubled over, head butting Fay and 'accidentally' kissing him full on the mouth. Kurogane wondered if it was possible to commit seppuku in that position right there as a crow cawed overhead and Fay traced his lips in astonishment.

"Should I... come back at another time...?"

An amused voice.

His father alongside one of his servants, Haganemaru wanted to die.

Fay the bastard, giggled.

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But as humiliating as the experience had been –Haganemaru learned about the birds and bees thing- it was probably one of his most-secretly-guarded-but-nevertheless-cherished memories. During the times when he thought of it he would inevitably blush and Fay would give him that half-knowing look mixed in with something else Haganemaru did not like. But he would always forget... that expression. For Fay would do something stupid and totally ruin the mood.

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**A.C.:** what the hell happened to all those bracket thingies? Ehh weird chapter, I need to... stop... something... I need a date with my sanity, yeah...

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**Eriol's Anui:** hah :P I always have problems with making the first chapters long my the other chapters tend to be longer... I think. Anyways, thanks for the input. I'll definitely keep those things in mind when I write x3 

**Lynne5:** thanks :)

**Pebblekit:** In this story, Fay never went to the time witch for help. Instead he decided to go by himself and somehow landed in Kurogane's home world. As a disguise, his currently masquerading around a child form; wonders of magic eh?


	3. Stroke of White

**A.C.:**Ahh TOEFL, I have shed blood and tears to register for you (still working on it!!) the blood came from my lips when I was chewing on it, the tears came after hours of staring at the processing screen -beep-

Please note that names in this story have been edited. Kurogane (err... the current one... in the manga right now I mean) has the name Haganemaru (why anyone would name their child strong-metal/full-metal is beyond me) and Kuroken has been changed to Kurogane.

Eck.

I'll fix it up a bit later. Too tired T.T;;

**Disclaimer:** Hmm I don't think so

**Pairings:** Kurogane + Fay

**Warnings:** Kuro x Fay-ness, author's insanity, and horrible grammar... there could be spoilers if you haven't been following the series closely.

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"_Fay?"_

"_Yes... Lord Kurogane?"_

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"Kuro-saaaama!!"

Kurogane had to physically restrain himself from breaking something. Quickly apologizing to the officials surrounding him, the dark haired lord of Suwa turned upon the bane of his existence.

Well... after his wife that is, he was still just waiting for the day they'd team up and finally put him out of his misery.

"Yes Fay?" he managed not to grit his teeth, that was good right? It showed patience and endurance.

All that went out the window when he actually saw the blonde.

"Holy...!!" Kurogane slapped a hand over his mouth and his nose as a string of curses threatened to flow from one and a jet of blood from another. Turning to the bemused looking –some looking as if they were suffering from heatstroke at the blonde's entrance- Kurogane grabbed a servant and asked them to go to have dinner without him. As the door slid shut behind the servant's back, Kurogane turned scowling –and red faced- towards Fay. Steeling his voice Kurogane demanded, "Fay..." there he collected himself, "Just what are you wearing?"

The blonde had the shame to run his fingers through his hair sheepishly as Kurogane's glare intensified.

"Ahh Big-Kuro-chan..." the vein on Kurogane's head twitched, "I..." Fay shrugged helplessly as he waved his hand in an absentminded way. "I grew up."

"I see..."

The throbbing line on the Japanese man's head became a full cross.

"And I don't have any clothes that fit me!" Fay began to wail as he clung on to the lord's leg. "I asked Gane-puu to lend me some clothes but he just stood there and slammed the door in my face!"

Kurogane didn't blame his son. Fay had somehow managed to grow up five inches over night and the cottony yukata he was wearing only came down to his thighs. Kurogane recalled the trails of fainted ninjas on the training grounds. Wincing, he was almost tempted to take off his shirt and put it over Fay's shoulders when an ominous thought hit him.

If the news of Fay going around in _his_ clothes ever got out, he would never hear the end of it.

He patted himself on the back for only touching the hilt of his sword and looked down, somewhat unimpressed at Fay's theatrics.

"What do you want me to do about it?"

Fay slowly let go of the lord's legs as if it had been the first time the thought had been presented to him. The look of concentration on the blonde's face was almost comical as he sat on the wooden floor, the short yukata –he was NOT looking dammit!- rising still higher up his pale legs. Fay replied hopefully,

"Lend me yours?"

"NO!"

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For once Fay was quiet staring contemplatively out at the waters that mirrored the color of his eyes.

Haganemaru yawned and leaned back against the grassy hill. He wished that his father was home so he could learn a new move or two. But he had the honorable duty of catching a fish for his ailing mother who had grown steadily sicker in the past few weeks.

The thought sobered him and he sat up shaking his fishing pole as if the action would entice the fish into biting.

At the rate the sun was passing overhead, it just might have.

"Ne Gane-myuu, let's go for a swim."

"And scare away all the fish? No thanks."

Fay pouted and Haganemaru noticed the tell-tale signs of sunburn spreading across the bridge of his nose. Feeling contrite the teen offered,

"Maybe you should go back home...?"

"But I wanna stay with Gane-pipi!"

Haganemaru was about to growl out 'it's Haganemaru' when another joined them.

"Ah Haganemaru-sama, Fay-san!"

It was a dark haired and honey eyed girl –vaguely pretty in her own way, Haganemaru reflected- swinging a basket full of herbs from her pink-tipped fingers as she gave them both polite bows. Fay waved his hand at this respectful gesture and patted at the patch of grass beside him. The girl happily sat down beside the blonde, offering him a sweet root –Haganemaru too but he turned it down- before broaching into the subject about how so-and-such plants were getting harder to find.

As the girl began to digress into the subject about her daily wanderings, Haganemaru found that the time was flowing slower –if that was even possible- and that he began to feel pain in the lower stomach area.

The pain intensified every time the girl beamed at Fay and Fay smiled back. Haganemaru poked at the knot in his gut and succeeded in giving himself even more pain. Settling for quick glares when the girl was not peering curiously at him he was near ecstatic when the girl announced that she had to go before the sun set.

"Oh and this is for miko-sama." She handed the handful of gold-flowered grass to Fay and waved. "Bye Haganemaru-sama, bye Fay-san." And Fay waved back equally cheerfully,

"Bye Suzume-chan and be careful!"

As soon as the flash of the girl's light gray sleeves disappeared into the green woods, Fay turned to look at Haganemaru expectantly.

Slowly Haganemaru turned his head towards his fishing pole feverously wishing for even a demon to bite the damned hook.

No such luck

"Gane-tan is..."

"Don't say it, don't you dare say..."

"Jealous!!"

"...it..."

In the end, they did manage to catch two nice sized fishes.

Even if Fay nearly fell in the pond... twice

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Haganemaru grinned in satisfaction as a line of bamboo fell over to mark the passage his sword had taken. He had learned yet another one of his father's moves and was practicing to hone it to perfection. The progress had been slow so far but steady. And though Haganemaru was frustrated at the speed of his development, he also knew that a poorly executed attack was about as good as none.

As another line of pole-like plants braced itself against an inevitable attack under Haganemaru's blade, a series of clapping sound made itself known and Haganemaru nearly cut himself instead.

"Hyuu, that looks daaangerous Gane-pii."

"Fay," muttered Haganemaru as he sheathed his katana. Not that he hated the blonde –far from it in fact- but he knew that once the blue-eyed boy appeared within the 5 mile radius, his carefully constructed training schedule tended to hang themselves out the window.

"It's almost dinner." Fay cheerfully replied to the unsaid question. Haganemaru's stomach agreed, letting out a series of small growls. The red-eyed boy's face colored but he compliantly walked towards where the blonde was sitting when a serious look presented itself on Fay's face. Stopping in surprise, Haganemaru was about to ask what was wrong when Fay continued, "And I missed you Gane-chaan!"

Sadly, due to his young age Haganemaru had never fully developed the ability to ignore Fay's antics. (Because ignoring anything beyond that was borderline impossible)

When he ran forward and drew his katana to bring it down on the blonde –he had seen his father try and fail too many times- he was surprised to feel a quick 'whoosh' at the back of his head. He came face to face with Fay, the blue eyes impossibly large against the cherubic face as the blonde smiled and pulled him down for a quick peck on the nose. Haganemaru blushed, immediately pulling himself away from Fay, pointing furiously and stammering out obscenities. A second later a protruding scythe attached to an armored limb buried itself in the leafy ground where the Japanese teen had been standing just moments before.

The blonde let out an appreciative 'hyuu' as the blade missed him by mere inches when coming back up from the earth.

Haganemaru wasted no more time in thinking. The teen jumped up to his feet and stabbed his sword deep into the demon's stomach as it made a move to take another strike at Fay. The monster screeched wildly as the he cut through the plated belly, the mass coils of intestines and other internal structure raining down onto the forest floor. Disgusted, Haganemaru wiped his eyes free of the blackish blood, dodging the demon's third arm as it ended up gouging another hole in its stomach.

"Be careful Gane-myuu!" Fay warned gleefully

At the demon's distressed call, its mate appeared on the scene seemingly enraged at the scent of blood permeating the air. Grinning at the potential challenge the bulkier double had brought, Haganemaru turned his back on the first demon and that was where it went wrong.

The first demon wasn't dead yet.

He felt the demon's raspy breath flowing against the back of his neck as the second stared down upon him.

But he never saw the fourth scythe aimed at his neck.

He never saw Fay throw himself forward to bodily shield Haganemaru as the demon let out a final shriek in death.

'Fay?'

"Hama Ryuu-ou JIN!!" the second demon never even had the chance to scream as it was torn vertically in two. It was the first time Haganemaru had been able to perform that move in one smooth stroke but he felt no pride in it. He only felt an acute sense of urgency as he saw Fay get up from where he had lain on the ground. Brown bamboo leaves scattered across his golden hair, he looked at Haganemaru in confusion. Seeing that the blonde had no more wounds other than the profusely bleeding slash on the shoulder Haganemaru relaxed about an inch.

"Wow... Gane-woof took it out in one strike!" the tone was light but there was no substantial strength behind it. Fay was trying to hide... again. It made him angrier than the fact that the idiot had just thrown himself at the demon's mercy when its death and destruction was just a finger point away.

"You idiot!" Haganemaru roared as Fay tore at his sleeves to bandage his cuts. "You could have just yelled!" the blonde didn't answer as he made knots to stop the flow of blood. The cloth immediately bled with Fay's blood as it smeared traces of crimson all across the affected area. Frustrated at the lack of blonde's response and slowness, the Japanese teen took off his shirt and began tearing it into long strips of ribbons.

"Gane-sama, someone might get the wrong idea..." Fay joked weakly as Haganemaru began to roughly tie the cloth around the wounds. The teen growled loudly and hastened his efforts, only slowing down when he saw how much more pain the action was causing Fay. Finishing up with the black-crescent headband, Haganemaru sighed deeply and ran a hand through his sweaty hair.

Fay thought Haganemaru might yell, perhaps go off in a huff and not talk to him for the rest of the day. What he didn't expect was a pair of arms around his shoulders as the young teen drew the blonde close. The action was somehow more painful than anything else Haganemaru could have done.

"Silly Gane-chan..." Fay sighed softly as he wove his fingers into the dark hair. "I'm fine see?" the Suwa heir refused to let go, holding him tighter still when the blonde tried to pull away.

"I'm going to get stronger." Haganemaru's voice was muffled, his face pressed against the gentle slope of Fay's shoulders. "I'm going to get stronger to protect my family; I'm going to get stronger so you won't have to run anymore!"

"Silly Gane-chuu."

'_Please don't make promises that you can't keep...'_

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"_My lord, you need a doctor immediately!"_

"_Quiet, my son might hear..."_

Haganemaru had heard the noise as he came out of his mother's room but thought naught of it. It was probably the entourage of soldiers coming back from another day of demon-slaying and asking for food. He was about to avoid the room altogether and walk past it –he had no desire to see more blood that night- when he heard Fay's _adult_ voice ring clearly amongst the crass voice of common warriors.

"At least let me go with you."

Haganemaru opened the door.

The warriors of Suwa knelt on the floor surrounded by whispering servants. His father was in front of them bleeding from the temple. Fay was kneeling beside him with a cloth trying to ebb the flow of blood. As the door shook open violently, they both looked up and smiled.

"See, I told you."

Haganemaru's eyes turned towards the broken sword on the floor. His father's usual katana lay broken at their feet, some of the shards missing with the length of it cloven cleanly in two.

"The sword's broken... the demon was that strong?!"

Kurogane shrugged, shaking off Fay's administrations and standing up.

"Yeah but don't tell your mother alright?" He put a tattooed hand on his son's head. "It's embarrassing." Kurogane smiled, his hand falling back to his side. "I better get going son."

The servants scurried forward carrying bandaging and salves.

_"We need to treat the wounds first!"_

_"We need medicine! No, a doctor!"_

_"Yes, yes!"_

"It's alright,"

"Tousan!" Kurogane's forehead was bleeding again. The scarlet liquid flowed down his face coating it in raw red. He smiled back down at Haganemaru.

"I just came back for one last thing." The door beside them slid open and Fay stepped sideways as Satou Daisuke**(1)** stepped forward, carrying something wrapped in cloth. The one-eyed man tugged at the string holding it together and the cloth fell away to reveal a silver katana with a dragon-headed hilt. Haganemaru's eyes widened as he saw the light bounce off the thin whiskers and the plated silver scales. Kurogane grinned at everyone's reaction as he took it from Daisuke's hands. "Our family heirloom, Ginryu."

"But... is the demon that strong?!"

If anything, the appearance of the silver bladed katana seemed to have agitated Haganemaru even further. Behind them, Fay was frowning as if trying to decide something important. Kurogane gave him a warning look as Haganemaru watched the exchange in dumbfounded silence.

"Aah, it's a little persistent this time. But... it's going down all the same."

"No." another entered the room, pale as moonlight but stronger.

"Mom!" the priestess gave her son an affectionate smile before directing her attention towards her husband.

"I cannot believe you were going take Ginryu without telling me." Her eyes were steely but her smile remained warm as he looked down at her in guilt. Shooting Fay an accusing look –the blonde replied with a blithe grin- Kurogane answered,

"You always work too hard..."

Kurogane kissed the night-black locks and kneeled.

"As do you."

-

-

"Wait!!" Haganemaru ran towards his father. "I'm going too." Kurogane didn't even spare him a glance.

"Stay."

"I'm stronger now, I can fight!"

Was it the magic from his mother's side that was making him act this way, Kurogane wondered. He'd have to ask her or Fay when they got back from another round of demon slaying. Daisuke chuckled and Kurogane knew that he'd have to answer.

And Haganemaru would stay.

"Aah, I know. You're stronger now." Kurogane touched his son's head for the last time. "So use your strength to protect the ones you love."

"Tousan..."

Haganemaru could only watch as his father turned away.

"Be good, be strong."

-

-

It was the servant's screams that brought him back to the main room. His mother was throwing up blood again. Fay's hand was alight with a strange fire pouring whatever energy he could into her convulsing body. The seizures abated as the soothing energy calmed her nerves, she shakily fell into the blonde's waiting arms arms. The mage seemed tired, none of the usual vibrance present in his eyes or words when he asked for painkillers and new bedding for the lady of Suwa.

At this the priestess protested, grabbing Fay's shoulders to push herself up to his sitting height.

"Someone go get a doctor." Haganemaru hissed as he kneeled before his lady mother. "Kaasan, you must rest."

_"Listen to the young master Mizuki-sama._**(2)**_ You've been praying over the barrier the whole day."_ The women grabbed a hold over the layers of kimono as she struggled to free herself, turning her black-violet eyes towards Haganemaru and Fay.

"Our lord has gone to fight. And I, as a priestess of Suwa... it is my duty to pray for victory. Take me to the temple." She reached out and touched Haganemaru's cheeks. She had never looked as frail and as strong as she did that night, pressing her shaking fingers to his face. The teen took it into his hands. Fay grabbed the other arm, gently guiding her into a standing position.

"Shall we go then?"

-

-

They helped her into the temple as the lighting began to web across the violet sky.

"Oy mage."

"Hmm Gane-myuu?"

Fay turned absentmindedly towards him, the liquid blue eyes eerily cat-like against the flashes of lightning. Haganemaru swallowed, his eyes darting from the stormy skies outside and back towards the blonde.

"Is it... bad this time?"

Fay didn't reply and the storm raged on. So did the sound of men fighting and the screams of demons as thunder roared with cacophony with them all. At the angle the temple was built in, they could not see the actual battle. But the auditory effects were enough as their imaginations provided macabre images to go along with the sound. At one point Haganemaru was sorely tempted to slam his palms over his ears when Fay sat up rigid as if he had been shot by something.

They both felt it, Fay obviously more than Haganemaru. Abruptly, the blonde spun on his knees and pried the doors open. Haganemaru could only kneel there in shock as Fay pushed the priestess down from her place in front of the image of the black crescent onto the unyielding wooden flooring. The Suwa's heir was about to shout in indignation when a sword appeared, stabbing the air where his mother had been just moments before.

Fay was quick to act; he ran his index and middle finger down the edge of the broadsword to draw out a spell with his blood. When he reached the curling sheath, the strange words flared to life as they lengthened and wrapped around the metal to hold it in place. Fay quickly grabbed the wrist at the end, violet light flaring from their contact as the wrinkled hand tried to pull back into the small portal it had come from. Fay yelled out something –Haganemaru wasn't sure what- and with a thunder-like crack the hand and the sword had disappeared, leaving the trio in the darkness as the fight raged around the barrier.

The lighting struck down, once, twice, three times.

Blood dripped from Fay's torn fingers and for a moment the blonde shook madly, his eyes growing wild as he clutched at his wrist. With a small spurt of maroon blood from the cut on his finger, the blonde stopped trembling and instead looked towards the pale looking priestess still holding on to the branch of withered flowers.

"Kaasan," Haganemaru started, tugging her arm up to his shoulders so he could carry her back to the Suwa compound. The priestess looked wearily at her son. Her eyes widened with pain as an intense fit of coughing rippled through her like a tidal wave. She began to make small choking noises, mouthfuls of blood exiting her throat and spilling out on the polished floor. Fay winced, his hand bloody as he rubbed gentle circles in her back and neck. Haganemaru carefully lifted her sweaty face up to the dim lighting. "Kaasan." She touched his face lovingly with her trembling hands, about to say something when the roof disappeared over their heads.

"The barrier is broken." She whispered faintly. Her eyes rolled backwards and she fainted in his arms as a grizzled head peered at the three, a familiar tattooed arm holding a sword stuck between its great maw. The sword dropped from the hand's death grip as the demon eagerly devoured the arm. It was Ginryu, the family heirloom.

"_Gane-chan..._" Fay whispered urgently as the boy got up. Mizuki slipped from his grasp and the blonde threw out his hands to catch her. "Gane-chan!" As if under a spell, the boy plucked the silver katana from where it was halfway buried in the wooden panels of the shrine. Eyes empty, he raised the blade at the monster's face. "...Haganemaru!!"

-

-

_In the darkness it felt as if his body had turned to jelly._

_He moved his hands to his ears to block out their voices._

"_Promise me that you won't die in front of him..."_

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**(1)-** Satou Daisuke: A name I made up for the eye-patch guy. Means 'help' and 'help'... uhh? 

**(2)-** Mizuki: Kuro-mama x3

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**Lindsay- **Thank you :) 

**NalanaSpinderOfSouls- **Of course x3, at least until there's a 'completed' sign at the top

**Lynne5-** -cough- well I'm more of a masochist, but I'm pretty sure you didn't need to know about that xD

**Tongari0104721-** Wow that was a long review, thanks for the input

I've made changes to Haganemaru/Kurogane thing (Personally I think Kuro-papa looks like Zima from Chobits)

Ehh I've read the manga (never watched the anime) but I've never noticed Kurogane actually refer to his mother and father as 'haha-ue' and 'chichi-ue'. Kurogane uses a semi-informal language from what I've read and the most respectful suffix I got out of him was like... '–san' when his father took out Ginryu or '-hime' for Tomoyo. So I don't think I need to change the 'kaasan' part of chapter two. (Trying to translate 'Honorable mother is going to kill me' nearly had me laugh out aloud a couple of times)

-Shivers- respectful suffixes are evil and should be shot. Why I love English so much -sighs- I'm such a traitor to my country.

I'm not sure you'll be getting anymore warm-fuzzies after this x3

**Zuzanny**- hmm that makes me wonder if Fay can turn into a girl...

**Eirol's Anui-** I realized that I've basically turned Fay into a pedophile... even if he possesses a child-form in this story. Ah well... if it's any consolation, Fay is the hottest pedophile I've seen so far.

**Darkdaylight**- Hah thanks :3


	4. Ephemeral

**A.C.:** Short one this time, there was more but... well wait till next chapter to find out ㅆ-ㅆ

**Disclaimer:** Hmm I don't think I'll ever own Tsubasa

**Pairings:** Kurogane + Fay

**Warnings:** Kuro x Fay-ness, author's insanity, and horrible grammar... there could be spoilers if you haven't been following the series closely.

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**Entis**- it depends on the Chinese character used. Yes, the part 'suke' can be like but it can be lots of other things I don't care to touch right now. (I used to have nice and _normal_ nightmares, now I have these Chinese characters haunting my dreams --;;) So umm... yeah... Daisuke can have multiple meanings as it is used in this fic, 'big help'.

But I think 'Dai' remains pretty much constant.

Thank you Zuzanny and Marie Neko for reviewing x3

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"I am Amaterasu, the ruling empress of Nihon." 

It was the first coherent sound that had penetrated the young to-be-lord's mind. It was like a blade stabbed through his flesh, a heated bolt of pain to arouse his senses. He shifted and moved, feeling the sword in his arms heavier than he remembered, and longer.

Wasn't it his sword?

The empress continued, her eyes straining to make out the form of the teen beneath the cover of the smoke.

"My sister had foreseen their deaths... but it seems as though we were too late."

The corpse of a demon beside her fell to its stomach in agreement. The empress' snow-white stallion shied, sidestepping to avoid the trailing intestines as the acidic blood ate through the ground. Kendappa-ou put a calming hand on the quivering neck of her mount; the stallion let out an uneasy neigh and stood still.

Deaths?

Too late?

The scent of blood wafted all around like souls departing to afterlife. His mind was hazy, much like the smoke and fires that covered his beloved land. He put one foot in front of another, trying to stand, trying to remember what he was to do.

Where were they?

"I have brought warriors with me to fight the demons that have penetrated the barrier. The demons on the inside are dead... but it seems that you were the one who took care of them all."

He did, didn't he?

He...

He didn't remember...

The fog cleared and everyone except the empress took a step back. Red eyes peered out at them from the dark, hellish and wide, more demonic than those of a man. If there had ever been a shred of humanity left in the pool of red it was gone now, lost to the throes of pain and loss the young man was willing to carve out with his sword.

The dark-skinned kunoichi immediately jumped to her empress' side, her arm holding all the anxious ninja at bay as Kendappa-ou contemplated what to do.

She urged her mount forward, the stallion stepping uneasily upon the uneven ground. The stallion crushed a small pebble beneath his silver hooves. The teen flinched at the sound and the empress immediately brought up her sword to block his incoming attack.

"How dare you attack the empress!!"

"Please wait."

There had been someone...

Someone who had been strong...

Someone with long black hair that cascaded down her back

Someone with kind eyes...

The attack had been powerful as expected from the Suwa's lord-to-be. With one long finger, the dark-haired royalty prodded the cut on her cheek. Sohma looked worriedly up at her; the empress graced her with a small smile.

"I suppose this means soldiers will be useless here ne Sohma?"

The dark-skinned kunoichi gave a respectful bow. She held an arm out, tense, and ordered them to attack.

Haganemaru only took one look at them before holding out his katana. The air around him seemed to spin like a miniature typhoon. Those who were lucky were thrown backwards with the force of the chi he was emitting. Those who were not were immediately skewered upon the dragon-headed sword.

The volley of ninja's continued and Haganemaru cut them down one by one. He ran like a demon possessed, specifically hunting down those who were sent after him. Formations were broken up, strategies exploited. The young to-be-lord beheaded a ninja begging for mercy, silence once again took hold of the heart of Suwa.

Sohma gaped openly,

"Not even our ninjas can stop him..."

"The lord of Suwa was strong and I'm sure he had meant his son to surpass him someday." With a howl Haganemaru stabbed a ninja in the chest and tore his sword free to block a strike from the back. "But it seems as though the young lord has lost his mind." She drew her sword, determination alighting her eyes. "It is unfortunate, but I cannot allow him to go on like this."

"My lady Amaterasu...!"

A young ninja behind Sohma threw his kunai startled. Sohma turned to stop him but it was too late. The hilt-less blades whistled through the air. The target jerked and held out a hand, successfully catching four but missing the fifth as it tore through his shoulders and laid his arm bare.

Haganemaru roared and renewed his attacks with fervor, tearing down men left and right as he blindly struck out against them all. Kendappa-ou's snowy stallion threw his head up rearing as she fought to bring him back down on the ground. By the time she had wrestled the creature into submission, Fay was standing beside her, in his arms the current priestess of Suwa.

Sohma let out a small gasp and immediately set to work on the too-pale woman. Tsukiyomi peeked out curiously, evading the concerned arms of her attendants and running to the dark-skinned woman's side.

"Lady of Suwa." Tsukiyomi said solemnly as she searched the blonde's eyes for answers. "But she is alive." Fay nodded, the familiar smile touching his lips as he gently bowed down to the princess in greetings. Sohma infused a small globe of energy into the night-haired priestess' cold breasts. The unconscious woman let out a small sigh. Sohma lifted her hands in relief.

"What has happened here Fay?" The empress looked down in concern. The mage was shaking, fine tremors coursing through his body. He looked up at her, his blue eyes haunted.

"I..." Tsukiyomi attached herself to the blonde's arm, lending him her silent support. Fay looked down at her startled. She smiled; her expressive violet-blue eyes innocent and trusting. Fay swallowed, his face hidden beneath his wavy, gold hair. "Let me go to him Empress Amaterasu. I will stop him."

"Let him go nee-sama."

Kendappa-ou was silent. She reached out and gently lifted his chin.

"Will you be alright?"

Fay nodded. Tsukiyomi tugged the older man down to her height and stood up on her toes.

"Don't worry; we'll be here right behind you."

"Aah."

-

-

The ninjas were still onto him left and right.

What were they, stupid?

Haganemaru sneered as he shoved Ginryu into a man's eye, slicing open the skull. Another, he ripped out the stomach. Still another kneeling before him as he cut off the legs. And the seconds flowed past much like the blood running down the mirror-like silver length of Ginryu.

"Stop."

A priestess, a princess, a child

All grows dark and yet she remains enveloped within the purest of lights, her hair set afire almost like the sun. She approached him, her tiny feet taking mere baby steps to carry her small form over towards him. She stared at him curiously, her lotus like hands holding out a sphere of energy that could have only been a shield.

A resistance

Haganemaru's face twisted into a snarl. He flew at her, intent on cutting her down like he did with the people that came with her. A small part of him was enraged at the fact that maybe if they hadn't been late, his father could have been saved. The larger part of him didn't care either way. He just needed to get rid of the pain.

"Turn your sword to me."

He woke up swimming in a sea of red.

He slowly –too slowly- took in the scene of carnage laid out before him. He would have fallen to his knees if the situation had allowed him to but he couldn't. His hand tightened around the silver hilt, his knuckles standing out bone-white amidst the red.

With a shaky hand Haganemaru pressed down on the wound, pinching the two folds of skin closed together as he tugged the katana from Fay's ribcage. Fay let out a small gasp inaudible except to Haganemaru's ringing ears. He almost lost his nerve right there and nearly pulled the whole thing out. Only Fay's pained smile held him tight to Haganemaru's fragile grip on reality as the blood grew darker and darker around his hand.

Haganemaru put on a brave face as the Ginryu slipped out of Fay's body. He dropped the silver katana like it was hot iron, hands flying forward to catch the mage before he fell to the ground.

Fay smiled brightly, drawing him to a bloody embrace. The blonde's arms were warm around his broad shoulders and Haganemaru miserably buried his face against the familiar shoulders, trying to forget the scent of blood and guts and trying to remember the smell of winter's snow.

Anything that would let him forget the day's events

Fay pulled Haganemaru closer to his heart.

The blonde's heartbeat was erratic, but it was still there.

"It's ok Hagane-chuu, I'm still here. I kept my promise."

Haganemaru began to cry.

-

-

Fay woke up in pain.

He bit his lips and hissed as he rearranged his arms to fold by his side. He gingerly pressed his fingers down upon the bedspread and pushed, nearly fainting in shock as stars exploded before his eyes when his body began to burn.

He was still gaping for air and clutching at his stomach when Amaterasu entered the room, attendants following a respectful distance away as she knelt by his side. Slightly uncertain as to whether her actions would do more harm than good, she began to rub circles into his back as servants poured bitter herbs and thick paste down his throat. He choked, feeling the twinges of pain rattling inside his ribs as the medicine began its work. The numbness began to spread from his stomach to his outer extremities until it finally spread to his head. He didn't protest when the attendants pulled him down onto the sweat-soaked sheets, feeling ill and hot.

"I am afraid I cannot give you anything stronger than this. You've lost much blood, Sohma's orders."

Fay rolled his tongue in his mouth attempting to curl his lips into a customary smile.

"I'm alright... is Gane-chan...?"

Empress Amaterasu replied with a smile of her own.

"Lord-to-be Haganamaru is resting as Lady Mizuki is. They are both being tended to by my sister Tsukiyomi. The people that were within the inner walls of the Suwa compound... they are all alive thanks to your timely intervention."

Fay looked away wordlessly.

"I let him die..."

Amaterasu gently pulled his head back before dropping a wet cloth on his face. When the blonde had recovered from the assault, the empress gently wiped forehead.

"Do you believe in Tsukiyomi's visions?" without letting Fay reply, she placed another fresh cloth on his face to cover his eyes. "She saw them dead, both and all. Lord-to-be Haganemaru was to be the only survivor of this great house. She saw what would have happened if you weren't there. You were there Fay, you mattered."

Beneath the cold cloth Fay wept freely.

-

-

The painkillers had worn off sometime ago Fay recalled ruefully as he felt the stabs of pain becoming deeper as time passed by. There was a servant at the door, probably one who would summon a doctor and one or two of the royalties even at this ungodly hour.

Fay resolved not to move.

He didn't want to bother anyone.

The door slid open and the blonde nearly snapped his head up in surprise. There was a harsh growl of 'get out' as the servant was kicked out of the room. Fay couldn't see with the wet-now-dried cloth over his eyes. But he could have picked out those footsteps against a thousand others, almost cat-like but heavier.

His suspicions were proven when the cloth was torn away from his face.

Fay smiled brightly,

"Gane-chuu, if you wanted to take advantage of me, you could have waited till everyone was asleep."


	5. Your Tears

**Disclaimer:** Hmm I don't think I'll ever own Tsubasa

**Pairings:** Kurogane + Fay

**Warnings:** Kuro x Fay-ness, author's insanity, and horrible grammar... there could be spoilers if you haven't been following the series closely.

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Thank you Saina Tsukino, Zuzanny, Alyana, Empress Satori, and Little-fox012 for reviewing x3

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_Haganemaru parted the bandage as fast as he could, clawing at the mage's hands when he half-heartedly attempted to stop him. The blood-stained bandages fell away to reveal a deep cut, angry red and raw to the touch. Haganemaru made a slight choking noise as he fingered the fevered flesh. Fay's knee gave an unconscious twitch and as if suddenly realizing where he was, Haganemaru hastily pulled away. _

_There was a look of acute horror etched upon the young man's face as the wound started to bleed afresh, the cut weeping red as Fay closed his robes. Before an apology could come forth, Fay pulled the teen back down on himself despite the pain and hugged him close._

_"It's ok, I'm alive, I'm sorry I scared you."_

_And it was as if a key had opened an enchanted door. Haganemaru began to cry._

_Dawn broke over the land, repainting the black and gray landscape into colors of carnage. Haganemaru let out a shuddering breath._

_"It's not Haganemaru anymore." He choked, wiping his face with his lower arm. "Kurogane."_

_"Ahh..." Fay whispered gently, curling his pale fingers around the lord-to-be's longer calloused ones. He put his pale forehead against the teen's dusky gold skin. "Kurogane-sama."_

-

-

"Kuro-sama!!" Fay cantered up on a lightly built chestnut. The colt's coat glowed like a newly minted gold coin. Fay had been the first thing to come to Kurogane's mind when he had first seen the unruly foal at a horse sale he had attended in the summer. He had purchased it on the spot, unheeding of the grave warnings the seller spouted as he dubiously handed the worn reins to the Suwa lord. He had managed to wrench the creature's head into a stranglehold as they neared the Suwa palace. Almost as if he had expecting the newest addition to the stables, Fay had bounced out, threw an arm around the struggling colt and blew Kurogane a light kiss.

Kurogane had come to rue the day he had thought to buy the blonde a horse.

It wasn't that the man didn't take care of his steed nor was it that the demon-in-the-hide-of-a-horse managed to terrorize and scatter the household's flock of sheep within minutes of his initiation into the pastures. They complimented each other very well, too well. The golden chestnut had taken liking to the mage and constantly whinnied to be saddled up everyday. When denied, the colt would jump the fence and begin stalking the blonde wherever he went, be it to the fields to gather herbs or to the council rooms where they _tried_ to settle on prices of grains and such.

It had gotten to be bad enough that Kurogane seriously considered _asking_ Fay to bind the dumb beast to a fence post. Of course that confrontation never ended very well, Fay would often clap his hands over the horse's twitching ears and wail that he was hurting the beast's, '_Hayagriva-chan's_', feelings.

Kurogane had been stunned. "You named that thrice-be-damned monster?"

But he couldn't deny that 'Haya-chan' had its uses. After the initial scare, it watched over the livestock like it had been raised with a litter of guard puppies and chased off any strangers that would dare to set foot upon its territory. He protected the only other person he would allow to come near, his mother, like it had been decreed onto him by some divine command to do so.

So he tolerated the horse's presence, mainly because of Fay, at least as long as either his mother or Fay was nearby or within hearing distance. Not even Kurogane was suicidal enough to confront the beast when it was charging.

The horse and the rider fell in step with the Suwa's lord. The blonde held out something fluffy and white.

Kurogane twitched when he saw the familiar wave like blue swirls.

"Kuro-chan I know will probably give all his coats to Lady Mizuki being the gentleman he is." The blonde sang, his blue eyes misty as Kurogane's scowl deepened. The golden chestnut colt nickered in agreement, prancing proudly as Fay rubbed circles into his neck. "It'll keep Kuro-pipii or Lady Mizuki warm on your way to the castle and back."

"There is no way," Kurogane pointed furiously; his mount didn't even twitch, it was far too used to having the night-haired lord fighting with the blonde mage. "That I'm wearing your damned fruity cloak." Kurogane held the cloak out at Fay, except the blonde was no longer there.

Fay and his horse had taken flight over the field of snow but not before the blonde had stolen a kiss from the lord. Throwing ice and pebbles from beneath his hooves, the chestnut had taken flight over the snow looking like a streak of gold against the black and white background.

"Be back soon Kuro-chaaan!"

"Lord!" gashing his teeth, Kurogane turned his stallion towards the head of the party.

Fay was so in for it when he got back.

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"Fay-sama?"

A week since their departure, a week enough for them to have made it to the imperial palace or close enough that they couldn't turn around without being hailed by one of the ninjas that scouted the area.

Fay closed his eyes, breathing in deep calming breaths as he loosely gathered up the hair covering his nape and cut it off with a knife. Tendrils of fair hair fell to the floor and burst into pale flames. He held the locks of hair in front of his face, looking indifferently at the flame-like jagged edges. Shrugging briefly almost as if answering an unheard question, Fay tied it into a sloping loop with a loose string and shoved it in his leggings.

The blonde held out a headband in his right hand and a handful of leaves and flowers in the other. Slipping the withered petals in the folds of the headband, the mage laced it into a knot twice before tucking it into his chest armor. He patted the place as if it was something precious to him; he turned towards the servant eyes, lazy.

"How do I look?"

-

-

A small breath of air, not quite a sigh nor was it a groan.

His breath illuminated into a cloud of fog by the chilly cold, Fay held his hair in front of him and tossed it straight into the air. The string untied itself and sprinkled the cut strands all over Fay, only they were no longer hairs but bits of pyroclastic ashes that formed a mauve-tinted bubble around him.

Humming slightly almost as if to encourage the falling cinders to stay afloat, Fay placed his right hand above his heart and dug in deep. Only the straight lines of his thinning mouth giving away his true emotions, the mage plucked a single feather from his soul and let out an appreciative whistle and a relieved laughter.

Immediately, it set the spice branches guarding the door afire. Fay winced but did not cease in his smile as he opened the doors to a small shrine in front of him and coaxed the black feather into entering.

The dark plume seemed to resist but went in, its thorny barbs seeming to disappear into the shadows inside. Only the deeply set heart of the feather, such a lovely shade of red and glowing, was visible. The feather floated serenely in its new home, as Fay closed the wooden doors.

A boy came up to him and rested a smooth hand upon the mage's arms, an unperceivable tingle of energy sealing the tiny shrine shut. Fay looked paler than usual. He tried to smile at the boy and failed, the stabbing pain his heart starting to sting after its incipient numbness. The boy nodded in understanding and led the blonde out of the rooms, making sure to smother the flames of the spice rack with a brand of his own magic.

Eriol, a mage sent personally by the empress to help out with the rebuilding of the Suwa compound.

'_Not a threat.'_

Eriol would do fine. He was young and powerful. Even if he were to go back into the servitude of Empress Amaterasu, Fay had hoped...

He hoped and hoped and hoped...

Fay let out a wet cough. The dark eyed boy smoothed down his back.

"You do not have to do this Fay-san. I alone am not strong enough to guard this great house by myself."

"Just until Kuro-poo comes back," Fay said dreamily. "Please Eriol-kun, this is the only way I can stop the demons from coming..."

Eriol frowned and smoothed his face upon realization.

"May fortune smile down upon you Fay-san."

"Not me Eriol-kun," Fay said cheerfully getting up. Color returned to his cheeks though he still swayed on his feet. He pressed a warm hand down on the boy's shoulder. "Just Suwa. May she undo all the misfortune I have come to free..."

-

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He whistles genially as he rides Hayagriva down the dirt packed road.

_One last time_

He waves to all the children, the flower-crowned girls and scrape-kneed boys. He nods in greetings to the farmers who raise their straw hats when he trots past, he even stops to taste a bit of bread fresh from the oven.

_One last time_

They were nice people, wonderful. Like the villagers he left behind in Celes. His joy faded slightly and Hayagriva, the ever perceptive colt of his, faltered in his step bobbing his head up and down. Fay laughs for the chestnut, giving the muscled neck a hearty pat.

Within an hour, they reach the boundaries of the Suwa barrier.

The barrier had been shattered and rebuilt so many times that Fay had lost track. And Fay knew that each time the shields had broken under the demons' claws, their land had shrunk in size until it was no longer necessary for their ninjas to spread out so thinly over the bamboo forests. Hayagriva gave an unhappy snort at recognizing the end of the trail.

Giving the colt a one last pat, Fay got off and turned his trusty steed's head the way they had come. Hayagriva flattened his ears almost immediately and bore his teeth. Tapping the colt's white streaked muzzle Fay chided gently,

"Don't give me that Haya-chan. You have to go."

Tossing his head, the golden chestnut planted his four feet in the ground. The rolling eyes suggested a short, 'No way' from the colt.

"You're getting to be as bad as Kuro-pii."

Recognizing a familiar name Hayagriva pricked his ears.

"That's right, Kuro-chuu would be so proud to see you right now."

The colt wiggled its lips. Fay hummed briefly before weaving his fingers into the colt's silky mane. The colt nipped at the armor's metal scales then dropped his head, disinterested. Meanwhile, Fay could already feel that demons were gathering outside. He had to do something before the entire hoard decided to attack.

"Haya-chan, why don't you go chase Kuro-chuu into the pond?"

Another snort, 'I'm not that stupid.'

"I suppose not," said Fay out loud. "But I can't promise that I can keep you safe..." we waved his hand lazily at the other side of the barrier. When he saw that the chestnut was no longer listening and was fixated on a single blade of grass waving tantalizingly between the frosted branches he couldn't help but smile though it was nothing compared to his fake ones. "Very well." Fay pressed his cool cheek against the muscled shoulders, imagining that it was Kurogane with him right there. "Then I shall do my best."

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The demons swarmed around the barrier, some nibbling at the protective shielding, others attempting to crack it with brute force. Still others were waiting outside the ring of frenzied attacks, eyes quickly darting over weak points of the translucent fortification as to take advantage of them. When Fay, astride Hayagriva, stepped out of the protective bubble, all actions ceased.

There was a caw of a demon crow as it flew circles like a vulture. More of its brethren joined it in its flight and soon the sky was black with eager eyes, waiting for the first drop to spill so they could pick the choice meat off of the blonde. A hulking bulk of muscles hauled itself over to the mage sniffing loudly, rudely. As it thrust its blunt and bleeding muzzle into Hayagriva's side, the blonde held out a hand. Immediately, the demon was blinded and squalling as it fell onto its back rolling and tearing at its wounded eyes.

With a scream of approval the demons began to close in. Fay smirked.

The next swipe of his hand made sure none of them would ever bother the lords of Suwa.

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Fay walked amongst the pile of smoking flesh and congealed blue blood. Hayagriva followed, rock-steady though seemingly unnerved by the sight of carnage. Fay patted the colt's golden neck giving him a slight 'I told you so' look. Hayagriva neighed and began to trot back towards the barrier. With no demons within sight, he had deemed his duty well-done and complete. Fay gave him a lingering scratch behind the ears as he went his own way through the path paved in blood. He kicked at the thick crust of green; his boots tattered after his trek across the acid coated earth. Still, he wanted this to be private. He didn't want his precious Hayagriva suddenly charging out from the barrier to get him. His horse was perceptive like that though he did not know whether that was an indirect effect of being near a powerful mage as he. He also didn't want Eriol to get involved when the young boy himself had so much to do. He sighed and ran his hand through the locks of his pale gold hair, the other hand placed gently above his chest piece.

Without warning, a sword sliced through his right thigh. The pain was excruciating as bits of flesh were torn away from the bone, an entire muscle pulled off half-way with a single flick of the wrist. He grabbed at the cut, putting pressure on it to minimize the bleeding. He would like to have seen Kurogane one last time he thought; he already knew this was the end for their attacker.

Their assailant could not harass them any longer when the Far Eastern witch's gaze pierced through their dimension.

"It's over, Fei Wong Reed."

As if agreeing, the sword withdrew reluctantly, a smoke of purple clouds marking its exit.

Fay felt weak at the knees.

'_...when you find someone stronger...'_

His breaths come out in bursts of chilled air, his curse protesting angrily at another prey lost. He wiped his forehead with a sleeve, and grabbed the other's hand when it moved forward to choke him.

"Hello Xing Huo-chan, it's been a long time."


	6. Falling

**A.C.:** Hope it was worth the wait, happy holidays everyone-!

**Disclaimer:** nope, not yet

**Pairings:** Kurogane + Fay

**Warnings:** Kuro x Fay-ness, author's insanity, and horrible grammar... there could be spoilers if you haven't been following the series closely.

Thank you Saina Tsukino, Thayend, Smiley-chan, Zuzanny, darkdaylight, artemyl, kingleby, Duchessa, darkdranzer, and Slurpiesun for reviewing x3

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"Very clever, mage of Celes." Fay beamed. 

"Everyone's always told me I was special."

Xing Huo's smile thinned. Her fingers slowly slipped inside his chest armor despite his cheery protests of '_I'm already committed_', and '_so-and-so is going to be jealous_'. She took out the knot and held it loosely between her index and middle finger.

"A strip of cloth from a man long dead. A handful of petals for the woman who prays over this land..." she dropped the knot at their feet. "Possessions from the lords and ladies of Suwa... I imagine you sent something with them to replicate your presence in their stead."

Fay merely smiled.

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_The funeral was held just a day after. The corpses would only attract more of the demons; they had to be buried quickly only there was no body of the Suwa lord to bury. Kurogane had handed Ginryu over when the reports came that there were no more bodies to be found other than the stinking carcasses of demons the others had dragged off to the edge of the woods. _

_The priestess-princess of Nihon, Tsukiyomi had promised the young lord-to-be a new sword to replace the priceless heirloom now buried in the blood-soaked earth of the Suwa lands. When the day had come to an end, bodies burned and scattered over the winds, bodies buried with make-shift tombstones marking their graves, the newly named Kurogane entered his room and did not come out until the next day._

_In the morning, just as the sun rose above the smoke colored skyline, he heard what was left of the men and women of their house gasping in excitement and fright. Thinking that perhaps there had been a demon or two amiss, Kurogane quickly sprinted to the yard and beyond where a pond was, a crowd of people skittering around its black crusted edges. _

_Fay was at the center of the chaos as usual, his small form hidden beneath a bulk of a slain demon as he hauled it out of the filthy waters. The grass shriveled up and died as soon as the waterlogged corpse hit dry land. Several of the maidens shrieked and scooted back as men came forward to carry it towards the burning pile out back. Fay remained in the black waters, playfully fanning himself as he caught his breath. Kurogane saw that he was still a man, not yet returned to his usual childish fey-like form._

"Hyuu, Kuro-tan's awake? Water's always liked Fay best."_ Unable to discern what was said Kurogane resorted to the usual gruff stance he took when dealing with the whimsical blonde._

"What are you doing?"

"Cleaning up hyuu-!"_ Kurogane patiently stuck his fingers into his ear when the other whistled--attempted to whistle--and took them out._

_The blonde climbed out of the murky waters, waving off any attempts to help as he squeezed his now gray hair. The Japanese teen hissed and stepped forward, putting a firm hand over Fay's wrist before pulling it down. The palms flashed pink and red in the sun. Demon blood was corrosive and the blonde was an idiot enough to bathe in it. His sudden action startled the rest into moving. A man came up forward to wrap a stretch of coarse cloth over the thin shoulders. A woman wiped his face and lathered it with slippery foam from an assortment of herbs. _

_These Kurogane--somewhat grudgingly--allowed, but when a hand--not his own and it seemed never his own--gripped Fay's yukata as if to rip it off, Kurogane jerked the blonde forward toward himself and swiftly led him to a nearby pond that hadn't been tainted in the battle. The mage threw the teen a quizzical look before smiling. He slipped out of the fraying material and jumped into the water trying to cleanse his body of the blood. Grinding his teeth at the painful pink of Fay's back lined in black; Kurogane threw him a bar of soap and turned around to give the blonde a modicum of privacy._

_...Which had seemed good in theory but he had already seen the man strip before him and jump into the pond. The action seemed quite pointless now that he thought about it above the noise of swishing water. The dark-haired teen inadvertently gripped his thighs and squeezed, digging his nails into the material and the soft flesh as Fay made small gasping noise as he dunked his head in and out of the water. _

_He had seen women wash faster than the blonde and was about to yell at him to hurry up when a child's voice, small and delicate, asked him for his shirt. Fay had turned back into a child. He frowned at the implication of the change, tossing his shirt backwards. It could simply mean that he'd rather save everyone the embarrassment of seeing him run around naked. Or..._

"Stop pretending,"_ Kurogane grunted loudly. Fay stopped, his thin calves still dripping with water. _"I get it, you're going to leave too but that doesn't mean you have to pretend that you'll stay forever." _He blushed, though he couldn't understand why--he wasn't a highly emotional teenage girl of all things. The redness of his cheeks was barely visible through his tan. Trust the mage to pick up on it._

_Fay hugged him back, the wet front of the shirt clinging to Kurogane's spine. His breathing tickled the teen's ears. Kurogane blushed further, earning a light laughter from the blonde. He thought that he could grow to love--he likes it already--that sound. Fay mumbled,_

"Kuro-pipii is so silly."

_The shirt was just long enough for them to stay like that without embarrassing themselves. At the age of fifteen, Kurogane has already gained five inches over the blonde mage and the shirt grazed the blonde's pale thighs. Fay breathed out and he was shorter, a teenager just like the young lord-to-be. He wasn't smiling but his expression was incredibly warm. The straight slope of his lips only turn slightly at the edges but Kurogane could already tell that it was genuine. Not the fake smiles--masks--the mages loved to wear so much. It comforted him, oddly enough. They had both lost something precious. But they were still alive, people around them were still alive. Fay, the idiot, was still alive. Kurogane returned it with a slow smile of his own._

_And they went back in the house; for Kurogane to properly receive the royalties and for Fay to change into something decent._

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The empress was a gracious hostess, nodding thoughtfully at the request of a healer and postponing their dinner to a later hour when the Suwa lady had fully recovered from the arduous trip through the heart of Nihon. She was sitting in the middle of the shamisen players, her larger instrument perched delicately on her lap as she wove her fingers into the strings. The glowing lamp light flickered and fell upon her hair; it breathed life into the gold and silver ornaments in her hair as she stood up and greeted the Suwa nobles.

They feasted upon things Kurogane had only heard of word by mouth. Empress Amaterasu casually stated that the official ceremony for his lordship would begin tomorrow and congratulated him on his management of Suwa. The dark-haired man nodded deciding that the duck recipe from China was highly overrated. His chopsticks picked at the peas, constantly losing them against the curved plate when an odd thought struck him that Fay should have come with them, where it was _safer_.

"Something wrong?" Tsukiyomi asked in concern as Kurogane's brows furrowed deeply. He shook his head, the brief spell broken at her delicate touch.

"No, it's... it's nothing."

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"You know I cannot let you go." Xing Huo murmured, burying her face in Fay's spine. Her thick locks curled around Fay's shoulder and upper arm as she tightened her hand around his neck not yet choking him but intent on holding on. He gagged slightly but grinned as he fingered her hands and loosened them, seemingly only with his touch.

"And you know, I won't come willingly."

His eyes were glowing, a wondrous, fantastic blue. His entire being resonated with magic as he spun around to face her as if they were in a waltz and he was there to take her onto the dance floor. Had she not known her master was awaiting her return, she would have fled; she would have fled from the cursed mage of Celes and never looked back.

But she feared her master's punishment more than what Fay could possibly do to her. She wrapped her arms around him and formed an elegant rapier in her hands. Before Fay could move away she impaled them both upon it.

Blood drops fell all around them in a haphazard circle, eating up frost and snow as the two stumbled as one. Xing Huo's eyes were glazed over as she quietly muttered a teleportation spell into Fay's chest. Fay shuddered as he felt his body becoming light, displaced as he ceased to exist in a dimension and was transported to another. His vision blurred and his stomach twisted itself into a knot. He tried to push the dark-haired woman away but found that he couldn't, his hands phased into her chest and out her back.

The blood assimilated into a broad band of red, wiggling like a living thing as it struggled to fill in the gaps and spaces. Fay let out a wet cough, a glob of blood hitting the earth and disseminating into organized dots and dashes. The lines connected and the dots became chains linking the divided sections of red with each other. Xing Huo's murmurs had steadily grown louder. Each word lifted the blood borne seal off the ground. The thousand points of light connected in midair, casting the two magickers into a cage of crimson beams. When at last the circle was complete they simply disappeared out of existence.

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"What do you think Kuro-pii?"

_The cat –kitten, Fay corrected insistently- was as gray as smoke and thickly furred. The mangy coat was sparse and falling out in places from what looked to be a flea infestation. The kitten's sullen blue eyes looked up at him nervously as it licked its nose with a pink tongue. Kurogane frowned. _

"Mage, let go of that thing. You don't know where it's been."_ Fay hugged the feline closer to himself, sticking his tongue out as he danced out of Kurogane's grip._

"Nya, Kuro-mi is so cruel!"_ and he set out to bathe the kitten in the nearest pond. Thinking that it was yet another one of Fay's ridiculous whims, Kurogane let it be and threw a smug look over his shoulders whenever he heard a particularly loud yowl followed by a squeal of pain. _

_At sunset Kurogane returned from his demon hunting. Ever since the events of the invasion of their stronghold, demons had been far and few most of them weaklings as delicate as a newborn. It seemed that in one hellish night, the entire population had been decimated. But Kurogane knew very well how fast the monsters multiplied and strived to rustle up any nest that he could follow._

_Fay sat in the sunset absentmindedly stroking a cream colored kitten's head. The setting sun had painted his pale skin almost as if it had been dipped in fluorescent pink and orange. His normally flaxen hair grew as dark a gold as those of dandelions as he turned around, noticing Kurogane's return. He waved enthusiastic, eyes closing in a familiar smile. But he didn't leave from his spot on the porch, his lap filled with a curled up body of a cream and orange kitten. Handing the reins of his horse to a stable lad nearby, the lord made his way towards the mage noticing for the first time that the cream kitten was the gray one Fay had found in the morning. He also noticed that the feline was dead and Fay wasn't ready to let go, yet. _

"Have a nice hunt Kuro-chi?"

"Don't call me that,"_ Kurogane said almost reflexively as he took a seat by the blonde. Fay's hands were littered with scratch marks, most of them thin and scabbed over. The dark-haired man frowned in disproval, _"you should get that looked at."

"In a while,"_ said Fay agreeably and continued patting the kitten some more. The last of the mauve had drained from the sky before Fay spoke again. _"Nee Kuro-pii, do you ever feel that you only greet someone to say goodbye to them?"

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Kurogane woke up, covered in sweat and panting heavily through his mouth. He brought a hand up and ran it through his damp hair before wiping the side of his mouth.

The moon was a mere slip of a thing, barely visible as it hung deep in the sky. Time to time it seemed to flicker and vanish until it became as the dark as the fabric of night itself. He swallowed thickly,

"Ma... Fay?"


	7. Snow

**Disclaimer:** CLAMP owns Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles. That's why you see the trademark wings, eyeballs, dismemberment, etc.

**A.N.:** Well I have no explanation whatsoever for being absent for like two years. Those who have waited, thank you for your patience and not flooding me with hatemail and the likes. In return I will try to wrap this fic up as soon as possible kay?

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**Entis –** I wish... if I did I would not be so poor ;. ;

**Kingleby -** Glad you liked it

**Zuzanny –** You'll have to see :)

**Chibi Bishi** – Yeah I can see where the changes could be confusing (especially seeing it after like two years -guilty-) I would correct it but then that would detract from my writing time (in reality, is just very lazy...) so I will go over it once I finish, or maybe I should get a beta -laughs-

**Kina-chan** – No, just taking my sweet, sweet time with it

**BeautifullybR0KeN** – Thank you for waiting

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_The dogs moaned miserably as they pulled to a stop on top of a hill overlooking the valley of the Suwa lands. The once green bamboo forests had been decimated, dotted with corpses and sluggish grey slime that he could only guess to be oni. There was a barrier over the vicinity of the compound, a one strong enough even for him to see. His mother stumbled out into the half melted snow beside him, putting a hand on the trembling stallion's black side._

_And there in the distance was an out of place golden body accompanied by one cloaked in midnight black. Kurogane was half relieved to see that the dumb beast still wouldn't let anyone sit on him aside from Fay but the feeling was quick lived as he realized just who was missing. Where was the blonde that should have ridden astride the beast's back? With a sharp whistle, the golden colt kicked up its heels and left the other. It cantered with a loping gait, easily stepping over the lumps in the ice to have a quick nuzzle with Kurogane's steed before thrusting his nose into his mother's neck. And he realized, Fay's cloak. Hayagriva nibbled on it almost lovingly as it rubbed its head against her._

_"What happened?"_

_Eriol, the priest-in-training, looked at him with solemn violet eyes. He bowed his head to an angle and replied respectfully,_

_"Oni, sir."_

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If...

If it had ended differently...

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The storm didn't stop. Where one ends another begins and it is like winter that never ends, winds that never go away, snow that keeps falling and cold that is omnipresent. The twins are together but separate, one trapped in his frosted cage of iron, the other with his feet lost in the snow, his eyes buried somewhere in the heavens. This is their grave, the accursed tower in the northernmost reaches of their world. This is their fate, to despair and pine away into nothingness. This is their crime, being born in parts rather than wholes, being born together when they should have come alone. This is their crime, the cursed twins of Valeria.

The bodies stack up one by one, murderers, rapists, and petty thieves. These are those destined to wander the snowy plains for as long as their mortal bodies persist. The ice preserves, the snow heals and they will stay forever. Yuui doesn't know when the first strings of disgust goes away, only that if he piles enough bodies on top of each other he will be able to reach Fay. If there are enough bodies, enough steps, enough strength, enough will, then maybe it will be enough for them to escape their tower in the snow.

Yuui doesn't know when the first of the nobles came hurdling out of the sky. Fay gave one warning shout, he must have seen the shadows of footsteps near the edge of the tower, and there the body came. Like a broken bird, their sleeves flapped vivid green and gold in the monochrome background of their daily lives. They landed, just as did the criminals and the guilty left out to freeze in the storm. Their necks snapped, face crushed, and bodies bent. Yuui had guiltily touched her scraped cheeks, stared into her vacant grey eyes before pulling her towards the sky.

His secret is that he had ripped her dress—her pretty, pretty dress—and wrapped them around his feet because they were soft, warm, and green, and he wanted to feel something other than the jagged frost encroaching on his soul.

The constant stream of bodies did not stop after that. To Yuui it looked like the very heavens had been plundered to punish them. He once saw a child, still cradled to his mother's cold breasts and wondered for what reason had they been imprisoned—sent away—if not to take away misfortune that had come with the twin's curse. Had their presence been enough, had it been so powerful as to bring an entire country to ruin? Pearls caught between his toes, Yuui kneels and rolls the round jewels between his fingers. Fay's voice is a whisper lost to the wind, the storm, the tower, their lives.

Yuui starts to cry and does not stop for a long time.

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Fay knows when the tower breaks his brother, when Yuui's voice begins to climb its frosted walls and up where it becomes swallowed up by the storm. Fay knows when the king takes his life, when the last of the righteous minds of Valaria twinkle out of existence. And Fay knows that if he doesn't do something then—now—something terrible will happen. And so he does.

Fay sings, above the clouds, above the snow, the ice, the hail and the storm until his misbegotten wails touch the sun that surely lies above the arctic polar cap. It pierces the tower of stones and shakes its very foundations. Fay's throat splits, it cracks, and it bleeds. Blood drizzles out past his chin when his torn lips are still mouthing out the words to a song he has never heard. He sings and sings because it is the only thing he can do and can't think of anything else to do. He sings, the spell breaks, his twin is his and his alone.

He can save Yuui and he does

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By the time Fei Wong Reed has turned towards the tower hidden in the snow, the twins are gone, out of his reach. King Ashura comes to take them as he should and is surprised when he finds not one but two boys huddled before the fire of the ruined castle. He delivers them out of their tomb, feeds them, clothes them, teaches them and makes them promise that when the time comes they will do the right thing.

And they do.

Fay and Yuui sit peacefully inside the empty castle, their king dead and entombed beneath the icy waters of the central fountain. Their magical servants Chi and Freya fuss over them before leaving because Fay waves his hand and Yuui puts his head on his twin's lap. A lone finger touches Fay's pale lips and the other blonde looks down, smiling with affection.

"Fay?" Yuui sighs as his twin curled his fingers into the fine blonde hair. "Sing something for me?" the blonde stares, his dark blue eyes drenched in sorrow. "Fay?" Yuui rolls onto his stomach and raises his head. Fay leans back and Yuui curiously peers into his face. Fay smiles back softer this time. He raises his hands and took his face into them,

"I can't, I have to go now Yuui."

His breath becomes caught in his throat. Yuui captures the hand at his cheeks and squeezes hard. Fay butts their foreheads together and sighs. There is a strange sort of light coming from Fay's skin. It is beautiful, hurtful, and miserable all at the same time. Yuui begins to weep because for a moment he believed that they might have won. Yuui weeps because for a moment he thought they might have been strong enough to brave fate.

"Don't forget..."—Fay's hand bursts in to bubbles and foam that trickle down his wrist. But his lips are still there, soft and delicate on the side of his cheekbone and nose. "I love you..."

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_Fay—no Yuui—fell to the floor, Xing Huo's body bowing with his as he puked blood, tears and reality. He was drenched in sweat; his thin body trembling even as with a sickening squelch, the dark-haired woman pulled herself off of his back. There might have been a command or two, but he didn't hear it. What he did hear is the creak of the door closing—another cage, another prison—and heavy treading. He looked up and saw Fei Wong Reed._

_"Welcome, Mage of Celes."_


	8. Sky

**Disclaimer:** CLAMP owns Tsubasa along with other kinds of _tsubasas _xD

**A.N.:** I hope the wait wasn't too long and the chapter was worth it. I had most of it written out but as always, dialogue needed working, some scenes didn't fit and –helpless hand gestures- Ah I hope to finish this soon, I don't want to drag it out too long especially since my writing style's a _little_ different from what I started this story out with so I guess that just means you'll be seeing more of this story around heh

Thank you Cher Zephyris, Melissa Brite, and Zuzanny for reviewing-!

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And there was... Fei Wong Reed. Fay's blue eyes widened at the amount of power radiating from the ancient lord. The man smiled knowingly, the eye behind the monocle glowing deceptively as Kyle and Xing Huo finally brought the blonde mage under control. Xing Huo removed herself from behind Fay, her chest slick with blood as she plucked the sword from his body.

"Leave us."

His voice was unlike any voice he had ever heard. It was like the distant rumblings of thunder, like the unheard cries when the earth broke away from its parent; it was terrifying—and so fascinating—in its power to behold. And strangely, his curse did not react. Not even when the man thumbed his face did the phoenix tattoo that branded his skin disappear. His skin tingled, raw like he had scrubbed too hard and was red and pink all over because of it. He let out a slight, hopeless sigh when the wizened hand obscured his eyes.

Like the diurnal songbird he stopped moving, thinking, breathing altogether in the dark. Words, incantations, spells, structures, circles were all lost to him when his chest piece fell away from him as though it had been eaten away by something unseen. His phoenix tattoo was borne to the chilled air, twisted but elegant against the pallor of Fay's skin. Fay's fingers touched the floor where it was met with the coagulant slickness of his blood. With a cry, his splayed his hand open and drew the first incantation he could think of in his mind.

At the same time Fei Wong Reed 'squeezed' with a muttered word. It felt as though something broke inside of Fay and became liquid. The broken pieces rattled inside of him, inside his mind, piercing the delicate inside and making him bleed. He slumped to the floor, spent, breathing hard. It soon slowed, the pain not decreasing but rather multiplying many times over. The older man seemed content to stand back and watch as the mage's breathing blended with warbled pain. A circle was summoned beneath him, red cascading towards blue. It seemed to lift the blonde and as a consequence, attempted to lift everything else off of him. The phoenix tattoo struggled mightily, looking as though it would be peeled off the skin itself. With a violent explosion of light, feathers scattered to the ceiling, three in all, only three.

Fei Wong Reed seemed disappointed and Fay laughed inwardly in relief—three, only three. At the wizard's beckoning, the feathers drifted down to the marble floor—glowing and beautiful—circling their maker wearily. Each was shaped like the ornate tail feathers of a peacock in shades of black and iron gray, dancing on the edge of his vision. They were encrusted with rubies in the center of the eye, framed by bright copper, silver, and gold dust. They were _Fay's_ memories. The blond mage struggled to get up, reaching out for his elusive memories as they fell compliantly into Fei Wong Reed's hand.

"Very well," He said, nodding at the weak mage. "This will do."

Unable to spit out more than a few curses, Fay let out a shuddering sob and grew to be still.

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He turned the feather over in his hands, the inexplicable sense of (_wrong_) taunting him like the residual presence of the mage that refused to fade. The feather-powered barrier was strong, but unnecessary. It flickered (once or twice) before coming down. But no oni dared set foot into Suwa lands; it had been like that for a while. Just like the few months superseding his father's death. His mother taught her craft to the priest-in-training and resurrected the original shield. It was far more subtle, weaker, but no longer as glaring in the moonlight. Eriol would say no more on the subject other than give Kurogane meaningful looks over the feather that the lord felt as though he should understand. The lord felt foolish and therefore became frustrated. With no more oni to kill, he haunted the bamboo forest where he had taken down his first monster. He held the feather in his hands, loosely because he was equally afraid of crushing the black barbs as he was losing it to the wind.

With a snarl, he struck down a bamboo pole. It was cut cleanly and slid sideways before falling. Brooding, Kurogane sat down, his sword placed above his knees and the feather still held in his hand. For a moment, he considered letting it go. Fay was gone, after three-generations of serving the lords of Suwa the blonde mage had disappeared. Then with a panicked beat of his heart, he closed his fingers again. It was an obsession, he despaired. He was like a sick man unable to get enough water, food, warmth, herbs, relief-

He needed to find the mage, but he had no idea how to start.

The Suwa priestess regarded her son with solemn eyes. Hayagriva whickered, his lips wiggling towards the feather. She held the reins out,

"Bring him home Haganemaru."

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Fay woke up in the middle of a blizzard where a ruined tower provided him a scant protection against the bitter wind. What remained of the stone and wood structure groaned against the strain and for a moment he feared that it would fall upon him before deciding that death would be a preferred ending to his story.

He stood up, the weather intent on beating him down. He looked around but saw nothing but endless fields of snow. He began to walk towards the origin of the storm only to trip and fall. He raised his fair head, his skin burning as though it had been dipped in oni's blood. He scraped the snow and ice off of his stinging skin and in the process uncovered a frozen corpse beneath the layer of whiteness. He jerked back in surprise, his eyes cat-like in their shape as he saw the storm slowly rebury the slack face. He dug the head up again, the torn throat, and the frozen blood clinging to the straw-yellow mane and beard. He saw the crown and the milky eyes, the grotesque expression of mania set in stone.

It was the king of Valaria.

Almost immediately he abandoned the body and tear through the snow for more bodies. Each corpse he excavated and recognized threw him in a state of frenzy that left him digging when all of his finger nails had come off against the hard frost. Crying out in anger, he did not realize that his rogue magic was tearing up the land and quelling the blizzard. He did not notice when the stones of the tower began to levitate and splintered into many places. He did not recognize the metal bars scattered in the corner, what had been a simple cage.

When at last, he found what he had been looking for; he hugged it to his chest and began to rock it back and forth. He sobbed out his misery, guilt, and frustrations to the tiny body tucked against the arms. The cold had preserved the sickliness and hunger perfectly on his younger twin's face. His twin should not be here, His twin's body should be resting in Celes – but somehow, instinctively, he had known that his brother would be beneath the ice and snow.

Time flew by unmemorable and slowly, Fay returned to himself. 'I love you' – his twin had said before leaving him. 'What love?' he wondered, for he had no memories left to discriminate between the good and the bad. He would die forgotten just like his brother because not even he remembered who he was before. His twin's body glowed, blue like the blues of his eyes. The light fractured the dimensions and he realized at last that he was not in Valaria. A feather was produced from the blue light and settled quietly on the dirty dress shirt it left behind. Fay stared at it in exhaustion and awe. The feather began to bob and dance, so unlike his, wholesome and good, no longer enveloped in blue light but a delicate floral pink like that of the sakura blossoms.

'Come with me' the feather seemed to say, 'this place is no good for you' he ached. It was not a matter of whether it was good or bad for him after all. 'come with me' it repeated stubbornly. 'Are you not curious…?'

'about what?' he finally replied, deciding that he had no use for sanity anyways.

'The man in your dreams, your brother, your darkling king, your memories.'

'Did you not love them all once?'

'_Yes...'_

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The journey to the heart of Nihon was brief. Hayagriva had twice the speed of his own steed and went about in a bullheaded way vaguely reminiscent of his owner's. By the time they had reached Amaterasu's castle, the colt was lathered in foam gleaming like a bright, gold coin while Kurogane himself was splattered in mud and both his arms nearly yanked out of their sockets. The colt refused to be handled by the palace guards and barely tolerated Kurogane's attempt at washing him off. The only thanks the Suwa lord received from the equine after throwing bucketfuls of water at the him was being chased into the nearest pond.

Everyone left the _bewitched_ horse alone after that.

Once he was clean (for it was not respectable to present himself to the dream-seer covered from head to toe in Nihon itself) he sought out the dark-haired girl and found her weaving a silken tapestry depicting a well filled with silver waters. The dark-skinned kunoichi beside her (Sohma) tensed and frowned at him as he unceremoniously bowed before the delicate princess and rose as she nodded her head in acknowledgement. He waited until her quick fingers had detangled themselves from the extravagant work and spoke.

"I need to find him."

"Hello to you too Kurogane."

The princess beamed at him, genuinely pleased to see him. Her attendants came forward to clean and massage her hands, dousing it oil to see that her skin stayed soft. He snorted slightly at the scent rolling his eyes when the ninjas surrounding him glared at him. Kurogane made a mocking face and growled, he had trained with these men and women once upon a time after all.

"Tomoyo-hime..."

"Patience Kurogane," Tomoyo wagged her fingers as she stepped closer,

"...is a virtue." Finished the Suwa ninja lamely

"Oh, I was going to say it was unbecoming of the Suwa lord to whine."

Kurogane resisted the urge to shout and scream as he would have done when he had been younger. He was asking her for favors; it was probably a good thing to keep things pleasant.

"Ah yes Fay," at once the violets of her eyes dimmed as though she was troubled, like when she had a particularly difficult dream she couldn't decipher. Sohma fidgeted around her, feeling helpless and useless as she tried to comfort the young seeress.

"Do you know where he is?" Kurogane asked, urgent.

"No," Tomoyo said slowly, her eyes regaining their brilliance. "But I know who does."

-

-

He woke up to a watery world. He gasped and sat up, swallowing both the hot water and the sweet air offered to him. In his hand, the dirty dress shirt remained, drenched and looking as if it would fall apart any minute. The feather floated at his eye level before landing on the surface of the tub. Fay bowed his head, breathing heavily. Water droplets fell from his head. The ripples bounced off the edge and bounded back towards him, lapping at the leather armor and black cloth. The feather maintained its distance, its floss-like pink color strangely endearing at the moment. He shuddered lifting his head and breathing into the dampness of the dirty cloth in his hands. He then looked half way towards the toilet where a dark-haired woman sat on the lid, looking disinterestedly at her nails. When she saw that the mage had gotten a hold of himself, she got up and slowly made her way towards him. Two child like apparitions appeared, sweeping back the transparent butterfly patterned curtain. Her hand touched the rim of the bathtub as he closed his eyes, his hands unconsciously tightening around the ragged cloth.

One of the children tried to take it away from him but he held firm. The eyes beneath his lids glowing blue as wafts of energy lifted off of him like steam from the hot water. The small hands immediately cringed back.

"Let go Fay."

'_No please don't, don't make me...'_

But for whatever reasons his fingers lost their strength and uncurled.

Yuuko watched quietly as Maro and Moro took the cloth away.

"You were brave Fay, you mattered. I'm sorry it wasn't enough."


	9. Lake

**A.N.:** I've been writing disclaimers for how many chapters now? Why do we even do it, obviously if we owned whatever fandom, we would be doing such and such instead of passing them off as fantasies on FFN. And so with my two cents about disclaimers, here is the end of Lords of Suwa, hope you guys enjoyed it.

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Thank you all reviewers, viewers, and the occasional lurkers who's been with me so far.

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"I need to find him."

"I know."

The dreamseer turned and began to walk away. Her entourage of guards followed faithfully, each throwing the lord of Suwa a dirty look. Kurogane growled, pushing through the trained nin—threatening one with the second Ginryu—until he reached her. She merely looked at him with her violet eyes, a slight pout forming on her peach-shaped face.

"Then why won't you help me?"

To this she replied solemnly.

"Because it will cause you pain."

-

-

Between Watanuki's cooking and the magical properties of the shop itself, Fay began to heal. Each day he could get up for longer, walk a bit further, and eat a little more. In the kitchen he swapped recipes with Watanuki and enjoyed a healthy amount of eastern food. In the evenings, he sat out in the yard, away from Yuuko but enjoying the same sake. By chance their skin connected and his fingers went through her arm. They continued to drink as though nothing had happened but when they got up, ready for bed Fay said quietly,

"I see I'm keeping you out of your home."

The phoenix tattoo on his back twitched with the knowledge but did not come to life. The curse remained slumbering and he touched his morpho-blue eyes aware of the magic being transferred in between them.

"You will die without the feathers, even with the magic of your two eyes. You've already begun to wither."

The blond nodded mutely in acknowledgement.

"I know."

Yuuko smiled, lazy, cat-like, luscious red lips stretching wide across her white face.

"You don't care." She said viciously, "You don't remember enough to care about what they were."

A moment of quiet and then...

"Yuuko-san, I have a request."

"There is a price."

"I know."

-

-

Somewhere across the worlds, a desert princess had her heart torn from her by an ancient design. Her lover, a defier and the destroyer of the worlds stopped time once more. Elsewhere, a cursed king slept underwater unawares, awaiting the tendrils of magic to come loose and he awaken from his shallow sleep. In Nihon, Kurogane struck a bargain with the dreamer, to protect what he loved and never take another life for his own. In Japan, Fay held a lovely-patterned vase and turned it over his feet.

The water was cold and his skin trembled and his toes curled. He dropped the vase and Watanuki caught it, panicking. Yuuko merely watched crimson eyes unreadable and the pipe smoking snow white at its end.

"Fay-san?"

-

-

Turning to Syaoran she said,

"You wish to travel between worlds,"

To Kurogane she said,

"You wish to bring someone home."

She closed her eyes,

"And the one you're looking for... wishes to leave."

Kurogane flinched though she seemed to not notice.

"Three different wishes... and one solution, to travel through the dimensions until your desires have been fulfilled." With a small hiccup Kurogane stepped backwards as Yuuko appeared before him, her pale fingers stretching out to capture chin in her hands. She stared into his eyes, red on red. He froze, magically unaware but still able to sense the heavy aura she was exuding. She asked sharply, "You want to find the mage... all of him?"

Kurogane batted her hand away,

"What is he, in pieces? Of course all of him!"

Yuuko almost smiled at this reply.

"Watanuki, bring me the vase... and the other things."

A gangling looking teen jerked his head back in surprise. He kind of reminded Kurogane of the priest-in-training Eriol though he didn't quite know where the thought came from. Perhaps, if this was a different dimension from his home, it would not be farfetched to explain away the similarities. Before he could ponder further on the subject, Yuuko began to collect her dues.

-

-

"What do you think Kuro-pii?" Fay chirped happily as nibbled on a piece of rice cracker. He rocked back and forth, trying to get a glimpse of the girl on the other end of the court yard. "She's pretty isn't she?" He leaned towards the other man and whispered conspiratorially, "almost as pretty as Mizuki-chan!" which caused Kurogane in turn to snap,

"No such thing!"

And Fay burst into irresistible giggles. Hopefully no one noticed him making an utter fool of himself. Kurogane himself tried to sneak another glimpse of the girl in the shadows of her father and other male relatives. She wasn't terrible on the eyes, fair, dark haired, and dark eyed. But the location of her home was a strategic point in combating oni, which was why she had been considered in becoming Kurogane's future wife.

And it didn't hurt that she brought a substantial dowry.

The said lord suppressed a mental groan.

He was of age and he wasn't blind as to not notice the shy half-coy looks the village maidens threw him when he was about. But he wasn't interested in them... or any women if he was perfectly honest with himself. His tastes ran blue-eyed, pale blonde and very--or perhaps not so much--male. Which was difficult when he was expected to continue the line of his fathers...

Fay elbowed him,

"Nee Kuro-tan, you don't look so good."

He wasn't surprised. The marriage negotiations had been going on for a month; Kurogane had rejected all three of the girls presented before this one. Granted, none of his men or the nobles was particularly taken with what they were offered but this one was actually showing chances of success. It made Kurogane ill to think about it, being bound to a woman, not even out of love. At least his father loved his mother, would he even be able to feel for this girl other than abstract irritation and anger at being kept from what he truly wanted?

He vaguely noticed Fay hooking an arm around his elbow to lead him away. Kurogane didn't protest. He was soon sat down near a river, Fay looking into his eyes anxiously to see if he was ill. Irritably, Kurogane slapped the offending hand away eliciting a smile from the blonde. "Kuro-pippii sick?"

"If I'm sick, it's probably from all the sweets you've been forcing on me."

"Maa Kuro-chu, it would have been rude to refuse a gift." Fay said easily, stretching. Kurogane watched with mild interest as the pale underside of his arms were bared--he wondered if he wasn't a bit insane for wanting the mage.

"I don't care." Kurogane said stubbornly.

The lord of Suwa expected more teasing, what he got was something else entirely.

Fay sighed, his deep blue eyes staring into Kurogane's red ones. Kurogane jerked his head back immediately but didn't break the gaze, not even when Fay's hand came up to rest on his face.

"I don't want them," Kurogane said suddenly, tersely, as though the words alone could keep them there frozen in time. "I don't want any of them."

Fay's eyes were happy and sad; he didn't think it was possible to feel such emotions at the same time.

"Kuro-chan I..."

"You swore you'd stay with me..."

"For as long as I could," the blonde returned without missing a beat. He held the other man close and didn't react when the lord's brow met his sky-blue kimono with an internal thud.

'_But Kuro-sama... what happens when I'm not here?'_

-

-

There was a feather floating over the girl's breast, something painfully beautiful that disappeared into the witch's hands. The boy looked devastated but determined as he held the girl close.

"And me?"

"...All in due time, lord of Suwa." Yuuko said, pausing when the boy--Watanuki--came back carrying a beautifully patterned vase with two odd girls jumping around in circles around him with glass cages in their hands. As the glass capsules opened, the far eastern witch handed the man the blue-and-white vase with a stern--'_don't break it_' and a smile promising him that something else would be broken if he did. Black and white manju-like creatures began hopping about. What seemed to be a serious situation just moments before seemed almost laughable. Kurogane stared down at the fathomless black depths.

"A jar, you're shitting me."

"A vase" Yuuko corrected, "magical, he's asleep in here."

"What did he have to pay?"

"Hmm you're quicker than you look. Equal exchange, the same length of peace for the time taken away from him and his brother. But if you think you can awaken the sleeping beauty you can certainly try."

"What's the catch?"

"Think of it as a favor... Valerian's were quite fashionable in their days." Then she added, "Time passes differently between dimensions, and every minute, Fay steps closer towards death."

And before he could say anymore, he was being sucked in.

-

-

He woke up surrounded by freezing waters and sinking rapidly. He attempted for the surface, cursing the dimensional witch up to fourth or fifth generation before giving up, disoriented and dizzy. Without a viable source of light he could no longer tell which way was up. But strangely, the jar--he imagined--was lit brightly enough for him to see up to 10 feet ahead and what he saw wasn't very encouraging.

'Fay!'

He kicked his legs, spotting the blonde mage near one of the deeper ends. He stretched his hands out, fingers cutting through the dark clouds seeping from the Fay's mouth. Only the darkness wasn't something innocent like shadows, it was blood.

Fay's opened his eyes, his face carefully neutral. Kurogane caught his hand and pulled, feeling light-headed as the lack of oxygen began to catch up with him. Fay's thumb wandered across the span of the lord's palm as though wondering if he was real. His touch was solid, it was sweet, it was the first time that he had seen the mage in what seemed like years.

'_You... you're not supposed to be here.'_

"Hello to you to you bastard!"

Kurogane snarled, air bubbles flying out of his mouth in a frothy rage as he bounced off the rounded walls and to get a better grip on the stubborn blonde's arm.

'You don't understand...'

Fay looked resigned, almost sad as he held a velvet-gloved hand out, whispers of his magic dancing madly beneath the pads of his fingers. His eyes threw off blue flames as the pupils narrowed and he threw a slew of magical words at the other man, expecting the spell to throw him back up to the surface.

Kurogane's forehead glowed with the symbol of the moon, a protection the princess-priestess Tsukiyomi had endowed upon him when she had made him swear that he would kill no man under her rule. Coughing out the last of his air in shock, Kurogane found to his surprise that he could still breathe.

Fay lay few feet below him, wearing a similarly stunned expression on his shadowed face. Kurogane floated past him, blocking the dim lights of their watery grave. Their eyes locked, red on blue and the blonde despaired, knowing which words would come next.

'I'm not leaving without you.'

The words were said tenderly, longingly. Kurogane had suffered in his absence; Fay could no longer remember why that was. By all rights he should have forgotten everything but the man was familiar, as though they had loved once and still did.

Fay didn't respond and Kurogane took it as closest to consent as he was going to get.

"This is yours."

He held out a feather, black dusted silver, a ruby encrusted eye in the center. It beckoned him temptingly, dancing in the fuzzy lights of his vision as he continued to sink. Another oblivion, a second oblivion, he could not take his life, there was a promise to be fulfilled, but someone had died in his place so long ago. He longed to pay it back--even if he couldn't remember the base details of his brother.

'Can't be...'

And Kurogane let go of the feather. The feather remained still, delicate over the lord's hand before swimming towards the blonde mage. But the black feather remained still before the mage's unyielding chest, stark against the white uniform. 'Go in dammit!' Kurogane mentally commanded, but the feather did not pay heed to the ninja's silent demands and time was running so short...

Before his eyes the feather began to fall apart. Pricks of ebony barbs led unfamiliar images across his eyes. The black framed red eye glowed like the darkest of rubies and a transparent hand pressed down against the back of his own.

Fay stared,

Kurogane stared as well, shell-shocked at this newcomer.

'Fay?'

'Fay...'

The blonde smiled radiantly, enough to light up the stone walls of the dark well. He placed his head against Kurogane's shoulders and whispered,

'_...Yuui'_

-

-

Kurogane opened his eyes in a field of white, a dejavu of sorts that would not go away even when he blinked his eyes repeatedly. The water, where it once had been freezing was cool and refreshing, lapping teasingly against his armor as he waded out towards where he saw a bed of lotuses and the person cradled in the middle.

"I'm not grateful."

Fay said when Kurogane's damp silhouette came into view.

"I didn't expect you to be."

"I don't even remember you."

"Liar." And Kurogane leaned close, close enough to hear the blonde's withered breathing and the lightning pulse through his veins.

"So many died for me already." Fay choked, raising a hand to touch Kurogane's wet face. "I will cause you pain... and eventually you too will pass." His hand began to lower but not before the lord of Suwa caught it and pressed it to his cheeks once more.

"Even so, you're still here." His hand seemed to encompass all of Fay. God Fay was small, he could admit it to himself at last--lord and lady he was so beautiful. He brought their foreheads together, eyes closed as he mumbled between their lips,

"This... this was our promise."


End file.
